Topic: Winner-take-all, beyond the Thunderdome Shitpig poetry contest. Cash prize.
Posted by .
Unregistered


. said:
. said: Where's our judge with the purse? I need to make rent. Chop fuckin' chop.

­Can we invite Shitpig to judge?

­trust me she has read them all


Posted by .
Unregistered


Shitty Shit Pig bigger than a planetoid
So much mass that her ass attracts asteroids
Smoke grass pop Norcs home unemployed
Come within ten feet and your nose destroyed


Posted by .
Unregistered


. said: Shitty Shit Pig bigger than a planetoid
So much mass that her ass attracts asteroids
Smoke grass pop Norcs home unemployed
Come within ten feet and your nose destroyed

now do Brian!


Posted by .
Unregistered


Ok.

Chunky Bri Bri pee stained pance
Double Ds looking rood like he got implants­
On his knees for a dude is is true romance
Ph.D in sucking tube GED in mortgage finance


Posted by .
Unregistered


is his* for the third line :mad:


Posted by .
Unregistered


. said: Ok.

Ph.D in sucking tube GED in mortgage finance

­
:lol:


Posted by .
Unregistered


bump


Posted by .
Unregistered


. said:
. said: Where's our judge with the purse? I need to make rent. Chop fuckin' chop.

­Can we invite Shitpig to judge?

­That would be great.  Can we?


Posted by .
Unregistered


Needs to be bumped.


Posted by Beano Martin
Unregistered


In Bartlett, where food is king
When cousin meets cousin, here's what they say...


When the stench hits your nose like a foul fecal rose, that's a Lori
When your FUPA expands past the strength of lap bands, that's a Lori

Rav4 struts scrape scrape scrap
'cause they're bent out of shape, from her weight-a
Heart goes pitter-pat-pat
'cause its stressed from her fat, medicate-a

When MS makes you drool like you dropped out of school, that's a Lori­
When you waddle five feet with a turd at your feet, you're in love
When you waked from a dream by your spouse's ass steam, signore
You can clearly derive, you're in old Ruzich Drive, with a Lori


Posted by .
Unregistered


:rofl:


Posted by .
Unregistered


Beano Martin said: In Bartlett, where food is king
When cousin meets cousin, here's what they say...


When the stench hits your nose like a foul fecal rose, that's a Lori
When your FUPA expands past the strength of lap bands, that's a Lori

Rav4 struts scrape scrape scrap
'cause they're bent out of shape, from her weight-a
Heart goes pitter-pat-pat
'cause its stressed from her fat, medicate-a

When MS makes you drool like you dropped out of school, that's a Lori­
When you waddle five feet with a turd at your feet, you're in love
When you waked from a dream by your spouse's ass steam, signore
You can clearly derive, you're in old Ruzich Drive, with a Lori

­
:lol::rofl::potd::rofl::lol:


Posted by .
Unregistered


Jesus fuck.  Two fat piles of shit are the true muse for the red board legacy.   :rofl:


Posted by .
Unregistered


Beano Martin said: In Bartlett, where food is king
When cousin meets cousin, here's what they say...


When the stench hits your nose like a foul fecal rose, that's a Lori
When your FUPA expands past the strength of lap bands, that's a Lori

Rav4 struts scrape scrape scrap
'cause they're bent out of shape, from her weight-a
Heart goes pitter-pat-pat
'cause its stressed from her fat, medicate-a

When MS makes you drool like you dropped out of school, that's a Lori­
When you waddle five feet with a turd at your feet, you're in love
When you waked from a dream by your spouse's ass steam, signore
You can clearly derive, you're in old Ruzich Drive, with a Lori

­
> Beano Martin

:lmao:


Posted by .
Unregistered


"When you waked from a dream by your spouse's ass steam, signore
You can clearly derive, you're in old Ruzich Drive, with a Lori"

:potd:


Posted by .
Unregistered


. said: The log's in play, descending fast
The early signs suggest it's vast
Ofttimes before the Hog dreamt big
But for sequoia to prove twig.
But not this, yea. 'It's loose! It's loose!'
Momentum builds like grain through goose.
The oaken shaft the vast rump quits
Fast followed by a burst of squits
Panting and heaving, Spanky reels
No drywall found, o'er he keels
Exhausted by his mortal fight
'Gainst half a stone of Faux-Mex shite.
While Shitpig hums a merry tune
And scampers back with bib and spoon.

­
Quoting this epic from the first page.

it's kind of shocking how well its written given the subject matter. Those two useless eaters better appreciate all we do for them.


Posted by .
Unregistered


SHITPIG MILK said: Shitpig's nipples are red and sore
cooper's droopers drag on the floor
Even using a Wonder Braw
Would not help this cowish squaw

Shitpig's boobs lactate effluvia
leaking virus and bacteria
that is one glass it's understood
That wouldn't do a body good

­Fuck, that last line is :lol:


Posted by .
Unregistered


Shitpig's on the Instragramb
Making new friends is her plan
Little does the piggy know
Siskel and Eggsuhbert have a show

They rate her videos from one to ten
Then rank them with their brethren
Spanky should be awful proud
That Shitpig's famous in the cloud

Shitpig spent ten hours with customer service
Inveighing against her recent purchase
Apple will you give me please
New Airbuds as I don't like these

Ma'am all the needful evidence
Shows these have been in your pance
Signs of yeast are off the scale
To say nothing of the smell

I'm afraid it's quite out of the question
in such a state of advanced digestion
I have spoken to the head of my department
No returns on earbuds so en'fartd

A pill must I take to calm my nerves
And eat several plates of hors d'oeuvres
Lori the Shitpig is who I am
60 followers have I on Instagramb!


Revenge I'll have right on the web
After one more pill to clear the cobwebs
And then I'll have just one pill more
And then one more for forty four

I'll show them they've been asinine
I'll show off my high hairline
I think I've lost a little weight
And look not a day older than 88


Posted by .
Unregistered


:notworthy:


Posted by .
Unregistered


Ma'am all the needful evidence
Shows these have been in your pance
Signs of yeast are off the scale
To say nothing of the smell

:rofl:


Posted by .
Unregistered


. said: Shitpig’s cunt is very dry
Hairy scary leaky pie
Her axe wound is always infected
Bacteria, yeast and viruses attracted

Only Spanky wants to see
The hole from which Shitpig does pee
It’s fly-blown and has many maggots
Shitpig married her cousin, a faggot

It’s loose and not attractive
Shitpig’s cunt is highly flaccid
Spanky’s little tiny cock
Doesn’t remind her of her negro bucks

Shitpig and Spanky loved Tyrone
In Shitpig’s hole they found a home
While Brian blew their unmentionables
Shitpig’s cunt grew to circumference unconventional

Her pighole is highly smelly
Her clitoris has mounds of jelly
Shitpig’s cunt is awful large
That cunt has green discharge

­What else needs to be said?

Only Spanky wants to see

The hole from which Shitpig does pee
It’s fly-blown and has many maggots
Shitpig married her cousin, a faggot


Posted by .
Unregistered


undefined said: The hog was meant to give Don nieces
Instead she spent her trust on Reese's

­
One more first page quote. This couplet is so good. THREE rhymes in each line. How the fuck...


Posted by .
Unregistered


Fread is Award-Winning Worthy!


Posted by .
Unregistered


Beano Martin said: In Bartlett, where food is king
When cousin meets cousin, here's what they say...


When the stench hits your nose like a foul fecal rose, that's a Lori
When your FUPA expands past the strength of lap bands, that's a Lori

Rav4 struts scrape scrape scrap
'cause they're bent out of shape, from her weight-a
Heart goes pitter-pat-pat
'cause its stressed from her fat, medicate-a

When MS makes you drool like you dropped out of school, that's a Lori­
When you waddle five feet with a turd at your feet, you're in love
When you waked from a dream by your spouse's ass steam, signore
You can clearly derive, you're in old Ruzich Drive, with a Lori

­
Genius. You write or do creative work for a living?


Posted by .
Unregistered


QUIMFERNO

For innumerable sins, some but venal, others mortal,
You, Signor Aligheri, have been summoned to this portal.
Virgilius, your spirit guide, no welcome need extend
I'm not just your familiar, I'm a kinda-sorta friend.
On our progress through Hell's circles, over each accursed glacis
We've grown to know each other as our mothers' care-gnarl'd faces.
I snagged you at the Acheron and grabbed you by the winkwonk
Then it was off to Limbo to behold the dudes that think thunk.
The second circle, Lust, for those in thrall to vag and donger -
I could tell by how you walked you'd fain remain'd a little longer -
We moved on into Gluttony. Remember how you asked
How a chaise remain'd unclaim'd here as we timorously passed?
And how, a twinkle in my eye, I told you bide and wait?
You pried, and all too soon now you are due to rue your fate.

About Hades' fourth circle no-one really gives a fuck
Yet we made time to watch Imelda's boulder clash with Scrooge McDuck,
Then drew upon the Stygian shore, beheld the sorry plights
Of those in life were radgy or plain miserable shites.
The heretics in Circle Six have all of time to contemplate
Their folly for embracing the Nicaean Council apostate.
The next tier is a motley crew - Baphomet alone wits
How 'violence' should encompass loan-sharks, suicides and flits.
Come Eight I saw you start to yawn, so we abruptly handled
The part of hell that's known as Tel Aviv-en-Inner-Mantle.
Last - almost - the traitors, of mankind the lowest shelf,
Perhaps in all of conscience, shoulda remain'd there myself.

For here we stand. You think it o'er. I have disturbing news.
The circles number a round TEN - and ten is Shitpig's cooze.

Behold the horror of the gusset God himself abandoned,
The scree of anal roll-off, the five-foot groinal canyon.
The yeast catches eyes, nose and throat like phosgene o'er the Somme.
The skidmarks cast adrift and tilled could feed Tenochtitlan.
A mass of hair so dense that if the lady chose to frot
She could in quick-smart time file EPCOT down to apricot.
The gleet it stings, the blip it reeks, urea crystals fall,
This stretchmark'd hide your prison 'til entropy claims all.

What's that? We know you weren't that bad. Don't take it as a slight.
A martyr's end is this vile slough of muffdruff and of shite.
For sure as a purse in Rome'll be purloin'd by Siptar yeggs
We each and every one of us end up in Shitpig's kegs.



Quick Reply
Moniker:
 

Registration Required

Thank you for your vote!

But in order to make it count, you must be a registered user.

Log In | Register | Close