death2me said:

I’ve been unemployed for three years. Death to me. I’m totally worthless and can’t get a job.

­
Work at McDonalds, bitch.

death2me said:

I’ve been unemployed for three years. Death to me. I’m totally worthless and can’t get a job.

Not even a blowjob? I'd be more than happy to reverse your fortunes. :wink:

Dear Brothers and Sisters, on this Sunday afternoon, please join me in prayer to renounce all evil.   


  
Please touch the screen as you pray.  
  
 
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirit of the occult and divination. I renounce your works of zodiac signs, witchcraft, clairvoyance, horoscopes, reincarnation, fortune-telling, hypnosis, yoga, transcendental meditation, mind-control, ouija boards, superstitions, and all other occult practices.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, Satan, and your works of unforgiveness, jealousy, anger, resentment, bitterness, vengeance, and violence. I renounce any sickness and pain you are causing.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirit of fear, worry, anxiety, and timidity. I renounce the fear of death.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirit of pride. I renounce your works of secular humanism, sensuality, pleasure-seeking, intellectual pride, and doubt.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirits of infirmity, suicide, despair, and depression. Even in those who are not repentant, I bind you for an extended time.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirit of bondage. I renounce all your works of addiction and compulsion: especially smoking, alcoholism, gambling, overeating, and masturbation. I renounce addictions to caffeine, nicotine, salt, and sugar. I renounce TV-slavery and addictions to prescription and over-the-counter drugs.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirit of listlessness and apathy. I renounce laziness, procrastination, and time-wasting.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, spirits of lying, confusion, and dizziness. I renounce all your empty promises of greed. I will not lust for money.  
  
In Jesus' name, I renounce you, all evil spirits. I renounce all your works and all your empty promises.  
 
In Jesus' name, I cast you out, never to return. Satan, I disarm you and take back what you have stolen. I destroy your strongholds, demolish your lies, bring down your proud pretensions, and make every thought subject to Jesus Christ.  
 
Satan, I destroy all your works.   
  
I make all these commands in Jesus' name.  
   
Amen  

Death to me now. :sad:

death2me said:

Death to me now. :sad:

­
You mean like right at this very moment? 
Do you have all your affairs in order?

. said:

­
You mean like right at this very moment? 
Do you have all your affairs in order?

No, I don't have a will or an executor. Not sure where I could find a suitable executor.

I'm a dumb, worthless, lazy, fat failure and should jump from the Leaside Bridge tonight.

death2me said:

I'm a dumb, worthless, lazy, fat failure and should jump from the Leaside Bridge tonight.

Pick somewhere else you'll never top the car hanging off that bridge.

just kill yourself a little bit, not all at once.  smoke some pot, kill your brain cells

. said:

just kill yourself a little bit, not all at once.  smoke some pot, kill your brain cells

drugs are bad mmm k

death2me said:

I'm a dumb, worthless, lazy, fat failure and should jump from the Leaside Bridge tonight.

what makes you think that will kill you?

you are like George Bailey,only without a guardian  angel

death2me said:

I'm a dumb, worthless, lazy, fat failure and should jump from the Leaside Bridge tonight.

All true, but we all know you won't. You are a liberal, and liberals like yourself are too much of a coward to follow through with doing the right thing. 
Yep, too dumb to jump, too lazy to jump, and too fat to jump. A failure is all you'll ever be.

. said:

death2me said:

I'm a dumb, worthless, lazy, fat failure and should jump from the Leaside Bridge tonight.

what makes you think that will kill you?

See, that's what I'm worried about--what if it doesn't kill me?

My psychiatrist says the fall won't kill me.

. said:

just kill yourself a little bit, not all at once.  smoke some pot, kill your brain cells

This is what I've been doing.

death2me said:

. said:

­
You mean like right at this very moment? 
Do you have all your affairs in order?

No, I don't have a will or an executor. Not sure where I could find a suitable executor.

­
Thats tough. Perhaps consult your spiritual leader for solace and advice.

Life sucks. Death to me.

death2me said:

No, I don't have a will or an executor. Not sure where I could find a suitable executor.

­
Dude, I'll gladly distribute your $150 of worldly possessions and drive the cats to the SPCA.  Tonight?

I'm a dumb, worthless failure. Death to me. :frown:

death2me said:

No, I don't have a will or an executor. Not sure where I could find a suitable executor.

I could arrange the disposition of your stereo 

:fancy:

death2me said:

I'm a dumb, worthless failure. Death to me. :frown:

­
 iPhone?

death2me said:

Death to me.
\
:crybaby:

What's bringing you down today sweetheart?  Are you upset about that ņigger on the new 10 dollar bill?

Death to me.

I see Katalyst is down to his last sock. Tragic.

I am a dumb failure.